Riding There Was Worth It

An Email to A Co-Worker

I’m not sure how we might use this photo, but I think it is funny.  I’m not sure why it appeals to me so much.  Maybe partly because it violates the PC stuff about never riding after drinking? Or maybe because it tells an important truth about the awkward clunky/bulky/pain-in-the-assed-ness of these suits unless one is comfortably inside one, in motion on a motorcycle.

This photo would probably bring out the worst in some of our audience because so many people have been killed or seriously harmed by drunk drivers and riders. Or died due to driving or riding impaired. To be clear, I am very much against drinking and riding (and, of course, driving). So it’s tough to figure out a use for this image, even though it tells a real truth about one-piece armored riding suits.

Maybe a ‘caption-this-photo’ contest, noting that: A) no drinking was involved, B) the photo was not set up or staged to be a provocative photo, and C) with an explanation about the actual circumstances of the creation of the photo to be revealed along with the winning caption? The title of the photo might be something like: "Here is one picture not worth 1,000 words.”

The actual circumstances: I was invited to join my wife, brother, and brother-in-law for dinner last week at the OMC Smokehouse. Great BBQ food located only a block from Aerostich. The place wasn’t its usual busy normal. My three partners for this dinner had arrived by car a few minutes before me and were seated in a booth directly opposite this bar. Nobody was at the bar, so I draped my R-3 over an empty bar stool and joined my companions. My wife noticed the arrangement of the suit draped over the stool like a passed-out drunk and took the photo. After a nice no alcohol-for-me meal I put the suit back on and rode home.

Compared to a riding jacket, these suits usually (and again) are a big pain-in-the-ass when going out for a social event. Before he died, the record-setting endurance rider John Ryan was famous for simply leaving his suit on all the time, wherever he was. But I always feel more comfortable if I can take my suit off when in a social situation like the one described above. Sometimes I can safely leave it on the bike, but in this situation and some others, that wasn’t or isn’t an option.

When it comes to what to do with my R-3 after arriving at public and social destinations, there’s a wide range of inconveniences. Riders on full-dress touring and ADV bikes sometimes stuff their suit inside an empty saddle bag. Others drape it over the bike’s handlebars, about as shown in the above photo. This has the extra advantage of helping protect any cute handlebar-mounted farkels from opportunistic thievery but isn’t safe if it is too windy unless a bungee cord is also used to prevent the suit from kiting away in a strong gust. At the other end of the spectrum are places like the dance studio where I met my wife for lessons yesterday. She’s a great natural dancer who loves to dance while I’m nearly unable to keep time and memorize even the simplest steps and moves. “Opposites attract” is all you need to know about this. Anyway, right at the entrance is a bench and a big rolling coat rack. Upon arrival, I hang my backpack off the end of this rack and then drape my Aerostich suit over it, exactly like how it is draped over the bar stool in the photo, except this rack’s horizontal bar is high enough so the empty suit looks more like it’s fully standing. Then I sit on the little bench and take off my riding boots and I’m ready to…er, go ‘dancing’, if you’d call it that. But my wife always has a great time, and they have a nearly perfect place to hang the suit.

I’ve known riders who will roll their suits tightly enough to be wedged under the bike’s frame against the rear tire, and those who use Aerostich Carry Straps to do the same, bungeed across a saddle, and there are a few riders like John Ryan who just keep the darn things on all the time despite everyone around them being in their comfortable street clothes. Unfortunately, there’s no sci-fi George Jetson press-a-button and it self-folds into a jeans pocketable size. (See 0:47 in this one-minute video for the idea.) An R-3 suit version sure would be nice. I wish I could write here we’re working on it. Maybe someday.

Last week I went to a concert at the West Theatre which was part of the annual “Homegrown Music Festival” here. The place was standing room only, so when I did eventually find a seat, I just sat there in my zipped-open-to-the waist Aerostich suit, enjoying the music, and remembering the great John Ryan. For him and me, No matter what this might look like, riding there is always worth it.

-- Mr. Subjective, May 2024